California Lovin'
by Natalie Tankersley
A whirlwind romance. Kisses on the dance floor, ice cream dates, and flowers every time he greeted her. Everything was sunny. Everything was supposed to be sunny.
They’d been talking for months. Michael knew he shouldn’t have led her on, taking her to prom and on dates even if he never called them that. But there was something about her that made him want to put the world at her feet.
The cotton of her skirt brushes against his legs as she spun, giggling, stopping herself from falling with hands on his chest. Catching one in his grip, he brings her hand to his lips, brushing them over her sun kissed skin. “Mia,” he said warningly, “don’t fall now.”
“Too late,” she giggled, falling into his chest. I’ve already fallen for you.” She tapped his nose with one dainty finger.
His hands fell to cradle her waist as she swayed in his grasp, eyes eagerly taking everything in. He shook his head. He should have known better than to take her to a sunflower field, but she loved flowers, and yellow ones were her absolute favorites in the entire world.
“Sweetheart, sit with me for a minute, okay?”
She hummed in response, legs folding underneath her easily as he lowered the both of them to the ground. “There’s a butterfly,” she gasped, holding her breath like she was witnessing a miracle. Michael failed to see what was so fascinating about the butterfly, but he looked, obediently staring off in the directions he was pointing.
“Mia, I really need your attention now, sweetheart,” he said, forcing her away from his chest.
She frowned at him, face falling in confusion, but she moved easily enough, letting him situate herself in front of him. “Is this about my cousins the other day? You know they were just playing. It’s not really worth getting worked about, and anyway––”
“No, Mia.” Michael shook his head. “I wanted to talk to you about the future.” He gave her a small smile and reached out to grab her hand. “Our future.”
“Oh,” Mia said, looking down at her hands, cheeks flushing. “I didn’t realize.”
Michael gave her a sheepish grin. “Yeah.” He looked around the field, desperate to find something else to look at while he talked to her. “I’m graduating in a week, you know––”
“Oh, I know, silly,” Mia said, giving him a brilliant smile. “Your mom and I have already planned a big party.”
“Well,” he looked down at his hands, so he didn’t have to meet her eyes. “Graduating means that I’m gonna be going off to college soon. I know we haven’t talked about school that much, but you’re only a junior. Mia, I got into my dream school.”
Mia reached out and grabbed his hand. “That’s great, Mike.” She brushed her thumb over his knuckles. “I’m so happy for you.”
“It’s in California.”
She looked a little stunned. “Oh. I, um, didn’t realize you were looking so far away.”
He pulled his hand away from hers. “It’s ‘cause my family’s there. I’m going to be leaving in June to go start setting up my life there.”
Mia smoothed out her skirt. “Okay, I guess I won’t see you as much as I wanted to this summer, but I mean, we can call and video chat and text.”
Breathing in, Michael reached out and cradled he face in his hands. She leaned into the touch, a pleased smile on her face. “Mia, sweetheart, it was never my intention to have a high school girlfriend.” Her eyes flew open, but she didn’t pull away from his grasp yet. Michael suspected that would change in a second. “I never planned to go to college with a girlfriend at all.”
Mia yanked her head out of his grasp so fast that it made his head spin. “Are you trying to break up with me?”
“Well, I wouldn’t put it like that,” Michael said, thankful that no one else was close by to hear Mia shriek. “It’s just that college is a whole new ball game. There’s gonna be so many more people there; I don’t want to limit myself.”
“Limit yourself? Are you trying to say that you’re settling for me?” Mia stood up and marched down a row of flowers, skirt swishing with each angry footstep. “Has our whole relationship been a sham?”
Michael hurried after her. “Mia, come on. You know California has always been my dream. I haven’t hidden that from you.”
“But you sure did hide the fact that you weren’t gonna wait for me. That you were just gonna drop me and chase after all those California girls.” She wouldn’t look at him. “Everything you’ve ever said to me is a lie.”
“That’s not true. Why would that be true? I love you, Mia, more than anything.”
Mia huffed and turned around; arms crossed. More than anything, Mia,” she mocked him, stomping at the ground. “You love me more than everything except California.”
“It’s my home.”
“You haven’t lived there in seven years. Is it possible that somewhere down the line home became here? I know you’ve only been here for four years, but your friends are here. People who love you are here. Your life is here. I am here.”
“You wouldn’t leave for me?”
“Why should I? You won’t stay for me.” She wouldn’t meet his eyes. “I’m not asking you to stay forever. Just give me a year. Stay for a year, so we can be close. We can leave together.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Then I can’t leave for you.”
“I thought we were in love.”
She laughed, tears running down her cheeks. “I thought so, too. Guess we were both wrong.” She trembled, and he reached out to grab her, but she jerked out of his reach. “Don’t touch me please.”
“I just want to––”
“I don’t care what you’re trying to do, love. You’ve just informed me that you had no intention of ever staying with me. Cause of course California and I don’t get to go together.” She wiped her eyes with back of her hand. “I just hope she’s as wonderful as you think she is.”
“Who is? Who are you talking about?”
“California, of course.” Mia glanced down her shoes. “I’m just not made for California, is that it?” She looked up at him, mascara smudged, tears still falling. “The worst part is that I know I would hate it there. I’d missed the cool air of the mountains, the bears walking across the streets, the roar of the dirt bikes, and the smell of exhaust in the air.” She shook her head. “I was willing to go, though.” Her face fell, and she squeezed her eyes shut, trying to hold back the tears. “I would have done anything for you.”
“I didn’t ask you for that,” he said, throwing his hands in the air. “I never wanted you to do that for me.”
“You didn’t have to ask,” she yelled back. “It’s what you do when you care about somebody. Location didn’t matter as long as I was with you.” Silence fell, and she shook her head softly. “I wanted to die with you.”
He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know what you want me to say. I’m obviously not the person you wanted.”
“Don’t say that,” she snarled. “Don’t put this back on me. This isn’t about me. This is about that you didn’t think our relationship was gonna make it. You planned for our failure.” She shook her head, amber curls bouncing with the movement of her head. “I guess I’ll see you around then?”
“Mia, don’t walk away from me,” he said, reaching out to grab her arm.
She threw her hands up into the air, causing her shirt to ride up. “Look, I don’t know how you’ve gotten it this confused, but I’m not the one walking away. You are.”
“Mia, it isn’t that I don’t love you.” He rubbed his eyes. “This has come out all wrong.”
She was still a vision even when he knew her heart was shattering under the weight of his confession. He hadn’t realized she would take it so seriously. She tapped her foot pointedly and raised an eyebrow. Several tears had worked their way out, smearing her mascara on her face. “Then make it come out right.” She spread her arms and laughed bitterly. “If you think you can fix this then go ahead and try. See if I care one way or another.”
“Sweetheart, you’re crying.” He was drowning under the weight of her tears. She didn’t cry often, and when she did, it wasn’t pretty. On more than one occasion, he had to leave the room before he started demanding names.
“Michael, how in the world did you ever see this going down without me crying?”
It was a fair question. “Mia, I––”
“Michael, shut up. Just take me home.”
The ride back to her house was silent except for her sobs in the backseat. She wouldn’t even look at him, and his heart plummeted in his chest. He had lost her. He had managed to make his first love despise him. He pulled up in front of her house, but he didn’t unlock the doors yet.
“Mia, sweetheart, please don’t hate me.”
With a sad smile, Mia wiped her face, smearing her makeup and shook her head. “I could never hate you.” He unlocked the doors. She stepped out, holding her purse close to her chest, and turned to face him one last time. “I hope you’re happier in California than you were with me.” She slammed the door shut.
They’d been talking for months. Michael knew he shouldn’t have led her on, taking her to prom and on dates even if he never called them that. But there was something about her that made him want to put the world at her feet.
The cotton of her skirt brushes against his legs as she spun, giggling, stopping herself from falling with hands on his chest. Catching one in his grip, he brings her hand to his lips, brushing them over her sun kissed skin. “Mia,” he said warningly, “don’t fall now.”
“Too late,” she giggled, falling into his chest. I’ve already fallen for you.” She tapped his nose with one dainty finger.
His hands fell to cradle her waist as she swayed in his grasp, eyes eagerly taking everything in. He shook his head. He should have known better than to take her to a sunflower field, but she loved flowers, and yellow ones were her absolute favorites in the entire world.
“Sweetheart, sit with me for a minute, okay?”
She hummed in response, legs folding underneath her easily as he lowered the both of them to the ground. “There’s a butterfly,” she gasped, holding her breath like she was witnessing a miracle. Michael failed to see what was so fascinating about the butterfly, but he looked, obediently staring off in the directions he was pointing.
“Mia, I really need your attention now, sweetheart,” he said, forcing her away from his chest.
She frowned at him, face falling in confusion, but she moved easily enough, letting him situate herself in front of him. “Is this about my cousins the other day? You know they were just playing. It’s not really worth getting worked about, and anyway––”
“No, Mia.” Michael shook his head. “I wanted to talk to you about the future.” He gave her a small smile and reached out to grab her hand. “Our future.”
“Oh,” Mia said, looking down at her hands, cheeks flushing. “I didn’t realize.”
Michael gave her a sheepish grin. “Yeah.” He looked around the field, desperate to find something else to look at while he talked to her. “I’m graduating in a week, you know––”
“Oh, I know, silly,” Mia said, giving him a brilliant smile. “Your mom and I have already planned a big party.”
“Well,” he looked down at his hands, so he didn’t have to meet her eyes. “Graduating means that I’m gonna be going off to college soon. I know we haven’t talked about school that much, but you’re only a junior. Mia, I got into my dream school.”
Mia reached out and grabbed his hand. “That’s great, Mike.” She brushed her thumb over his knuckles. “I’m so happy for you.”
“It’s in California.”
She looked a little stunned. “Oh. I, um, didn’t realize you were looking so far away.”
He pulled his hand away from hers. “It’s ‘cause my family’s there. I’m going to be leaving in June to go start setting up my life there.”
Mia smoothed out her skirt. “Okay, I guess I won’t see you as much as I wanted to this summer, but I mean, we can call and video chat and text.”
Breathing in, Michael reached out and cradled he face in his hands. She leaned into the touch, a pleased smile on her face. “Mia, sweetheart, it was never my intention to have a high school girlfriend.” Her eyes flew open, but she didn’t pull away from his grasp yet. Michael suspected that would change in a second. “I never planned to go to college with a girlfriend at all.”
Mia yanked her head out of his grasp so fast that it made his head spin. “Are you trying to break up with me?”
“Well, I wouldn’t put it like that,” Michael said, thankful that no one else was close by to hear Mia shriek. “It’s just that college is a whole new ball game. There’s gonna be so many more people there; I don’t want to limit myself.”
“Limit yourself? Are you trying to say that you’re settling for me?” Mia stood up and marched down a row of flowers, skirt swishing with each angry footstep. “Has our whole relationship been a sham?”
Michael hurried after her. “Mia, come on. You know California has always been my dream. I haven’t hidden that from you.”
“But you sure did hide the fact that you weren’t gonna wait for me. That you were just gonna drop me and chase after all those California girls.” She wouldn’t look at him. “Everything you’ve ever said to me is a lie.”
“That’s not true. Why would that be true? I love you, Mia, more than anything.”
Mia huffed and turned around; arms crossed. More than anything, Mia,” she mocked him, stomping at the ground. “You love me more than everything except California.”
“It’s my home.”
“You haven’t lived there in seven years. Is it possible that somewhere down the line home became here? I know you’ve only been here for four years, but your friends are here. People who love you are here. Your life is here. I am here.”
“You wouldn’t leave for me?”
“Why should I? You won’t stay for me.” She wouldn’t meet his eyes. “I’m not asking you to stay forever. Just give me a year. Stay for a year, so we can be close. We can leave together.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Then I can’t leave for you.”
“I thought we were in love.”
She laughed, tears running down her cheeks. “I thought so, too. Guess we were both wrong.” She trembled, and he reached out to grab her, but she jerked out of his reach. “Don’t touch me please.”
“I just want to––”
“I don’t care what you’re trying to do, love. You’ve just informed me that you had no intention of ever staying with me. Cause of course California and I don’t get to go together.” She wiped her eyes with back of her hand. “I just hope she’s as wonderful as you think she is.”
“Who is? Who are you talking about?”
“California, of course.” Mia glanced down her shoes. “I’m just not made for California, is that it?” She looked up at him, mascara smudged, tears still falling. “The worst part is that I know I would hate it there. I’d missed the cool air of the mountains, the bears walking across the streets, the roar of the dirt bikes, and the smell of exhaust in the air.” She shook her head. “I was willing to go, though.” Her face fell, and she squeezed her eyes shut, trying to hold back the tears. “I would have done anything for you.”
“I didn’t ask you for that,” he said, throwing his hands in the air. “I never wanted you to do that for me.”
“You didn’t have to ask,” she yelled back. “It’s what you do when you care about somebody. Location didn’t matter as long as I was with you.” Silence fell, and she shook her head softly. “I wanted to die with you.”
He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know what you want me to say. I’m obviously not the person you wanted.”
“Don’t say that,” she snarled. “Don’t put this back on me. This isn’t about me. This is about that you didn’t think our relationship was gonna make it. You planned for our failure.” She shook her head, amber curls bouncing with the movement of her head. “I guess I’ll see you around then?”
“Mia, don’t walk away from me,” he said, reaching out to grab her arm.
She threw her hands up into the air, causing her shirt to ride up. “Look, I don’t know how you’ve gotten it this confused, but I’m not the one walking away. You are.”
“Mia, it isn’t that I don’t love you.” He rubbed his eyes. “This has come out all wrong.”
She was still a vision even when he knew her heart was shattering under the weight of his confession. He hadn’t realized she would take it so seriously. She tapped her foot pointedly and raised an eyebrow. Several tears had worked their way out, smearing her mascara on her face. “Then make it come out right.” She spread her arms and laughed bitterly. “If you think you can fix this then go ahead and try. See if I care one way or another.”
“Sweetheart, you’re crying.” He was drowning under the weight of her tears. She didn’t cry often, and when she did, it wasn’t pretty. On more than one occasion, he had to leave the room before he started demanding names.
“Michael, how in the world did you ever see this going down without me crying?”
It was a fair question. “Mia, I––”
“Michael, shut up. Just take me home.”
The ride back to her house was silent except for her sobs in the backseat. She wouldn’t even look at him, and his heart plummeted in his chest. He had lost her. He had managed to make his first love despise him. He pulled up in front of her house, but he didn’t unlock the doors yet.
“Mia, sweetheart, please don’t hate me.”
With a sad smile, Mia wiped her face, smearing her makeup and shook her head. “I could never hate you.” He unlocked the doors. She stepped out, holding her purse close to her chest, and turned to face him one last time. “I hope you’re happier in California than you were with me.” She slammed the door shut.
Natalie Tankersley is a junior at Christian Heritage in Dalton, Georgia. She is actively involved in the theater department there as both sound technician and stage manager. In her free time, she enjoys writing anything from short stories to full length novels, riding motorcycles, and designing graphics for her friends. She has previously had a short story published in Calhoun Area Writers’ anthology, Telling Stories 3, and Gold Moose Publishing’s The Gold Moose Talent Spring 2021.